If I Were POTUS (President of the United States)
Original publication: 2001

Copyright Andrea Reynolds 2001 All rights reserved. Please do not distribute or publish this column without the author's written permission and without financial compensation.

During a conversation about the last presidential election, someone asked what I would do if I were elected president (Don't worry, I can't be: I don't meet the 14 year residency requirement.) Having a Canadian sense of humor – satire flourishes mostly in Canada and the U.K. – here are sixteen things I would do:

1. Make Ralph Nader my Vice President, and choose a cabinet of people who remind me of the surrogate President (Kevin Kline) in the movie, "Dave".

2. Eliminate all those extravagant, expensive state dinners. (Who lives like that?)

3. Use the money saved from #2 to feed hungry American kids.

4. If a world dignitary comes to visit and we're having meatloaf that night that's what he or she gets... along with my full attention and a meaningful conversation about things that really matter.

5. Retire Air Force One during my term of office and, like John Madden, travel only by motorhome. If the Pope has the Pope-mobile, mine can be the Prez-mobile.

6. Put a Quaker in charge of defense. Or a smart woman who can solve more world problems by talking it out than resorting to fighting with weapons.

7. With the money saved from #6, make higher education affordable and available to more people.

8. With #7 in mind, add Grade 13 to public education which is the equivalent of first year university. College would then be only 3 years, leading to a degree.

9. Require that all US phone companies upgrade their performance and customer service to the level found in Canada. (This one should be deleted as I'm not happy with Bell Canada. )

10. Require that any boy (or man) who gets a girl or woman pregnant is granted automatic, full custody of each child who results. If males are held accountable and responsible for the care and raising of their issue, there will be fewer teen welfare moms. And if females knew they'd have to give up their babies to the males they consort with, they might make smarter choices in the partners they choose.

11. Urge Congress to move toward a three-political party system, like Canada has.

12. Fund more reading programs for kids and adults, especially in zip codes where the reading level is below the national average. And, provide how-to booklets which provide important and practical knowledge while allowing new readers to complete a whole "book" in short time, thus generating a sense of achievement faster... which escalates their enthusiasm for reading.

13. Provide tax breaks so that families of all income levels can have in their home at least one piece of good art, and a minimum of 3 books: a dictionary, an etiquette reference, and a religious book of one's choice: Bible, Torah, Koran, etc.

14. Make foreign travel a graduation requirement for all high school students, especially to a Third World country. Seeing how life is in Asia or South America or India can wake up the most complacent mind.

15. Make available to the public all information the US government has been keeping secret about UFO's and extra-terrestrials. A list of all aliens living in your neighborhood will be provided on a special web site. Just plug in your zip code.

16. Bring speakers, teachers, and authors into prisons to help prisoners upgrade their knowledge of life skills, etiquette, health, morality, spirituality, and vocational skills that go beyond manual labor. (Why waste a captive audience?) This may reduce repeat offenders.

OK, laugh if you will... but do you really like things they way they are now?

Andrea Reynolds Copyright 2001
 
Who am I? I am a long-time consultant trained in family studies, education, and marketing and communications who looks for ways to make work meaningful. Lately I've been finding my work for experts not as fulfilling. I'm ready to be the one in the limelight, and also I have become frustrated with what's happening in our society and I can no longer stand back and do nothing.

Early in life I chose a life that was not boring. I've experienced life's highs and lows, and many unusual events. At the age of 50-something, I have gained the empathy and understanding to provide unorthodox but healthy solutions to others who are in a crisis, are headed for a crisis, or want to minimize future crises.